-[ThOuGhTs oF My oWn]-

Everything that is Z

2010-11-23T21:31:00.000-08:00

Everything that is Z

Because of my last post, i would like to bring my blog back to live by posting about something, someone so special, it is because of that person that I started living the real life. A best friend like no other, a person who stood by me in difficult times encouraging me and lifting my spirits up high, introducing me to so many new things in life. So, if you're reading this post Z, you know that it is about you. I don't know where to start on the wonderful things that you do, no matter small or big. I am a shopaholic and I'll always be one but you showed me how to make full use of my money and that money is not the world, it does not bring real happiness and love.

"No one can serve two masters, because either he will hate one and love the other, or be loyal to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and riches!" Matthew 6:24

You showed me what real life and love is all about. I love going on this journey with you to discover ourselves and the fun part is that we have a lot of similarities, more to discover, huh? I love sitting around with you, talking about everything under the sun, going for walks, playing badminton with you making me run everywhere (although that is kinda tiring), watching movies, you bringing me out to eat or shop or just walk around or eat more. hehe! Not to mention your family. I really appreciate all the hospitality that you and your family has showed me. Thank you Z. For just being here and for doing all the things that you do.

-You're the best thing I never knew I needed-

weight

2010-06-12T18:37:00.001-07:00

being judged for the way you look is extremely common nowadays. The obese are always ostracized from the society. Only the stick-thin models end up on the covers of magazines implying that we have to be that size to be beautiful. Yes, the models do look great on the cover but not everybody looks like that, and not everyone can afford to look like that. For some people, to look like that they would have to starve for a lifetime. Well, that is not very practical right? Believe me. The thin or the "hot" will turn heads every time they walk past. Don't believe me? Try noticing the next time you're in a mall or somewhere crowded. Not only the guys will stare, girls too, wishing that they were like that. I know because I am like that. I wonder why my metabolism rate is sooo low. I wonder why I get fat so easily when some of my friends who can eat ten times more than me are just half my size. Does this mean that I cannot enjoy the greatness of food because I have to watch my weight? I didn't know that I was like that until a few months ago, I started eating normally. Notice the word normally... When I came back to Penang, I realised that I have put on 5kg. That is a lot of weight for someone to put on. I just don't understand. I went to the doctor and he told me to eat less and exercise. I don't know why I am so pressured by this. I am still normal after all. It was when I sat down and thought hard I realised that it was all in my head. My environment. At home, if I put on weight, I would be teased. And the worse part is, your size is the only thing that people notice after not seeing you for a while. They say 'wow you put on weight' or 'you got chubbier or fatter'. Well, if they don't say it to your face, they will be talking about you behind your back, which is worse for me that is. Is being thin so important? What if you're thin and sick? What is the point? And nobody is helping me. All they do is 'look at your thighs, so big!' or 'your fats are causing your pants to explode'. WHO IS HELPING? Who has to suffer these torments? I just don't get it. Everybody is so caught up with their teasing that they neglect the thought 'maybe this girl needs help' or 'maybe she needs to see a doctor'. No. The teased are just left to defend for themselves. Now, before you tease a person about their weight, put yourself in their shoes and imagine how you would feel if you were him/her. Don't say that you will never let yourself get to that level. The future is uncertain. So, keep your harsh comments to yourself and think about someone's feeling before saying anything. Because you might not know, you might end up in that place one day. These teasing will cause people who are a littly chubby think that they are obese. STOP THE TEASING AND PUT YOUR ENERGY INTO HELPING THEM.

The comeback

2010-06-06T07:20:00.000-07:00

THE COMEBACK
And the process to revive my blog begins. How long has it been? Time really flies. It has already been one year since I first went to INTEC. One year. 2 semesters. I feel as though I am in a bullet train, travelling through the passage of time, watching my life as it goes by. Life is more routined nowadays (although there are some surprises along the way), still, it reeks of monotony. Everyday, I get up at 6 or so, drag myself out of bed to the toilet, freeze up in the bathroom because cold water is all we have, brush up, blow my hair, prepare breakfast and then off to catch the bus to college for classes which start at 8. In the evenings, I brave the cold in the library as I sit there doing work/ study. Dinner is always at Ehsan which is walking distance from college and after that it is back to the freezing cold library until about 8 or 9 and then back to my hostel.

Then came final exams. The feeling of standing in front of the Great Hall still terrifies me even after one year. Fear along with the cold air that seeps through the tiny gaps between the glass doors and the wall is a feeling that cannot be described. Not to mention the wait in front of the hall. My insides screaming "Let me get this over with. Open the doors quick!!" Until the moment the door opens, my heart pumps with the speed of light and when the door finally opens, my heart stops for a second. I glanced around, people rushing in the hall as though they were prisoners finally being freed. But there was no sense of freedom here. And instead of rushing out, people are rushing in. Without haste, I followed the flow and my eyes searching for the sign that read "10M3". I panic when I saw no sign, heart thumping. My eyes fell to the seat right in front of where I was standing. Phew. A sign of relief that was. '10M3' was taped to the seat. I proceed to my seat and wait for further instructions. I make sure that my pens and other paraphernalia needed for the examination are arranged properly on the left and my I.D on my right. Instructions to write our names on the paper were given out. I could see heads bend over as I bend mine to write my own name. I hold my black pen ready to start. The hall was so quiet that I could have sworn that I could hear the clock ticking. And the invigilator says "you may begin ." now." Pages turn swiftly and pens started moving. Moving. Moving. Cold sweat wets my right palm as I wipe it on my shirt occasionally. The sound of the chief invigilator picking up the mike sends chills down my spine. How much more time do I have left? 10 minutes? 5 minutes? Or is he going to ask us to stop writing now? Despite all that, my hand never failed to move in sync with my pen. 10 minutes left. 5. Stop writing now. Those three words burns holes in my hand. Am I done with answering? I ask myself this question as I flip the pages to my question paper frantically while the other invigilators start collecting the finished or unfinished papers. And after that, I grab my things and walk out, forgetting all about the exam paper and to concentrate on the next one.

That was basically what I went through during exams. It is a battlefield, I tell you. The questions are the enemy. Divide and conquer, we must. Conquer especially.

So, after all the exam horror and drama, my friends and I went out for dinner. Well, before that we watched a movie. =) Bounty hunter. A nice one that was. Hilarious. Walked about Sunway Pyramid and met up with a few more for dinner. At Manhattan Fish Market. Yummy. *licks lips* Thanks guys for the book. =)

And I proceeded to buy Kiran her birthday present. I tried so hard to hide it from her.. hahah! But gave it all away when I gave her her present on her birthday! which happens to be mine too. OKay. So I was working on her birthday present almost close to midnight when the door to my hostel room opened and suddenly i heard people singing Happy Birthday.. How sweet of my friends to do that for me. And there was cake and presents. Best surprise ever. I can't thank you guys enough. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! One of the best birthdays I've ever had. =))) all smiles!! Nick called all the way from AUSTRALIA.. double surprise!!!

The real day however was great too! I called Kiran first thing in the morning to give her her present!! She was obviously surprised and i hope she likes it =) and after that was just simply wonderful. Had dinner at Chili's and walked around. And learnt how to solve the Rubiks Cube.. but have forgotten how... =P hehe

Then came MOVING DAY!!! One of the most dreaded days of the semester other than exam dates. It really was a test of my fitness level. Obviously, it was and still is below average. Probably negative. haha! Well, up and down 3 floors carrying a whole lot of stuff; bag after bag, box after box. Most of it goes to Aunty Pearly's car though.. ahaha Thank goodness she was there to help me. Honestly, I was on the verge of throwing everything down. After that, I had to unload everything from her car to her house. And I had to pack for Bali.. My cousin came to bunk in with us that night.. and so we left for Bali for 4 days.. when I came back I stayed at my cousin's place for almost a week and had loads of fun =) with them and family..

Now, I am back in Penang, kinda missing fun in KL.. haha! But i know that next semester will be another blast... a better one than this semester for sure! Don't get me wrong, I had a lot of fun this sem. I am just implying that next semester should be better. Well, it better be. =P ahha! Until next time.. Ciao! =)

Food food food

2010-03-28T02:20:00.000-07:00

The Shrimp Linguine

The Pizza- Appetiser

The Quartro Platter Shogun! -Buffet

Shogun- Dessert

Shogun

shogun... Shogun! First round!

What a week!!! But then again, it was fun.. Chatting with Vivien (my roommate) and then waking up late in the morning!! super late!!! I snoozed my alarm around 3 times a morning before i can actually get up...!!!! Goodness! anyway, Saturday was I-Code. It was like a carnival. They had reptlile shows, demonstration by the Bomba and Silat.. Public speaking and Ghost House... haha! Well i would say that the Ghost House was the highlight of the day. Scary, of course, but entertaining to hear everybody screaming! Haha! =P Kudos to those who put so much effort to come up with the settings and the effects. =) nice one.

So, after everything... I rushed to the KTM to go back to my aunt's house! She made resevations at Shogun as it was her B'day!! yesterday... ahahha! The food was good!!!! hheheh!!! and today, Lunch was at Italiannies.. another fantastic meal!! =) so, i went to Nichii and i saw a few tops.. tried on... didn't like them very much but i liked the shorts... then came the final piece... the one with the butterfly sleeves.. loved it so much! it is 59.90.!!! reasonable and nice... well.. i didn't get the shorts but i will definitely go back for it!! =P

They say that a picture worth a thousand words.. so.. enjoy!!!

Pictures

2010-03-17T22:45:00.000-07:00

the flower mosaic that i did for my sister's art.. hehe
the messy messy table when my mum, sister and i did her art work
and yes, i drew that. the title was alam fantasi.
part of my sister's cupcake cake..

the full cupcake cake... =) i surprised my sister with it.
the pizza Fione and I ate at Hard Rock

the kids pool @ Hard Rock
Top: Jeremy Bottom (from Left) : Kim (sister), Me, Harold, Mei Yen

well.. i think i owe my blog some pictures.. heheh! well here they are... happenings in March 2010 and one of them was taken during CNY 2010... the highlight is my sister's birthday.. which happens to fall on the 16th of March.. =) hahaha .. On Monday Fione and I went up to Hard Rock for lunch.. pizza!!! haaah super dee duper yummy!!! well.. here are the pictures... =)

short.

2010-03-13T07:28:00.000-08:00

what is it really?
random thoughts or inevitable events?
or just the effects of too much thinking done within a few seconds?

the poem

2010-03-05T02:09:00.000-08:00

I was feeling terribly emotional the other day and decided to pen my feelings.

She said that I need to stay home for the rest of my life,
I always knew that her mask was too good to be true,
She wanted me to leave but she wanted me to stay at the same time,
So how am I to choose between my mama and the rest of my life?

She saw me sitting by the window sill looking out at the big blue sky,
Hoping one day I'll soar it,
But plenty of years have come and gone by,
I am still sitting here waiting for my turn.

I've been held back for a long time,
I wonder when I will get to see the world with my very own eyes,
My chances come and go not taken because I never try,
I just sit there and wait for another chance to come and never pass me by.

Should that chance come by,
Grasp that chance I shall,
Hold it tight with my own two hands,
God give me the strength to try..
And never let me regret that I didn't let it pass by.

Bing Yang saw my blog and he yawned at it and said "BORING!!" i was like... fine fine .. hahaha well Bing Yang you should know that i will be uploading pictures whenever i can!!! hmmmph!! hahahaha =P well... if i have the time... IF... big word to use.. ahhaha. =)

valentine's day movie

2010-02-12T19:06:00.000-08:00

i am finally back in Penang!!! weehee!! hehe =D Went to Gurney for lunch yesterday.. at Sakae Sushi... Yummy food!!! heheheh! love it... =) hehe ! Nick came late... like quarter through the movie.. oh yeah..!!! Valentine's Day movie is GOOOOOOOODDDD!!!! i love it sooo much!! hehe! very very very very nice... well i practically went awwwwww....awwwww throughout the whole movie.. hahah! =) highly recommended! hehe! So, after the movie... Fione and i DDR-ed.. haha! while Nick -poor him- had to hold our handbags for us.. hahah! =P but it was fun... beat Fione by million plus.. hehe! and we moved on to drums.. and once again i triumphed over Mokkie Pokkie.. haha! yay! so we were left with one more coin.. hahah! Nick had to buy another so that we can race together.. haha... i would say that girls rule.. hhaha! just kidding Nick!

after that was ICe- Cream!!!! nice yummy Ice cream with chocolate chips as toppings.. heheheh! oooooo.... as i left my cable back in the hostel.. i am sad to say that i can't upload pictures for the time being.. next time then!! =)

Valentine's Day Post a week early

2010-02-06T18:22:00.000-08:00

Angels brought me here- Guy Sebastian

It’s been a long and winding journey,
But I’m finally here tonight picking up the pieces walking back into the light
Into the sunset of your glory where my heart and future lies
There’s nothing like that feeling when I look into your eyes
My dreams came true when I found you, my miracle
If you can see what I see,
That you’re the answer to my prayers
And if you could feel the tenderness I feel
ou would know, it would be clear,
that angels brought me here
Standing here before you
Feels like I’ve been born again
Every breath is your love
Every heartbeat speaks your name
My dreams came true right here in front of you,
my miracle
If you could see what I see
You’re the answer to my prayers
And if you could feel the tenderness I feel
You would know it would be clear,
that angles brought me here
Brought me here, to be with you Ill be forever grateful,(oh forever faithful)
My dreams came true when I found you,
my miracle
If you could see what I see
You’re the answer to my prayers,
And if u could feel the tenderness I feel
You would know it would be clear that angels brought me here
Your the answer to my prayers (Yes they brought me here)
If you could feel the tenderness I feel
You would know it would be clear,
that angels brought me here

My aunt played this song in her car yesterday.. it is quite an old song.. so yeah.. i
never knew that i kinda missed it.. =) so here it is.. listen if you have the time =)
it is sehr good!! hahaha!

Valentine's Day is coming up!!! exactly one week from now.. i am guessing that i
won't have time to update then as it will be the first day of CNY.. so yeah i am
posting it now.. to all my friends HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! hope you guys have a wonderful
Valentine's Day! =)

weekly update. =)

2010-02-05T02:23:00.002-08:00

Today, class finished at 12 something. Our lecturer managed to finish Doppler's effect... I find that this semester I like physics more than any other subject. Don't ask me why.. hmm.. maybe it is because of my horrifying physics marks last semester.. and they are going to send my results to my parents.. * gasps in horror* oh well. i am still debating with myself on whether i should go shopping this weekend.. I told my aunt that i will be able to go for a while because i need to study for Bio test this wednesday!!! hmmm... I wonder why they changed the date and the time for the test..

Anyway, back to today.. i had to go to my aunt's office... i decided that this would be the way every week because it would be more convenient for her as she doesn't need to pick me up every friday... all theway to shah alam.. i already owe her a lot for good food and her washing machine.. and of course her ironing board.. last weekend i had so much trouble ironing my clothes because i did not have an ironing board.. =( so, i had to clear and clean my table just so that i could iron 3 t-shirts... hahaha.. oh well.. at least my table is clean now.. =)

i realise that i diverted from my point twice already... so today i took ktm to sentral to dang wangi.. i had to wait the rain out because i did not have any umbrella... sad isn't it? but it is alright... i was reading a copy of this month's Reader's Digest, one of my favourite magazines. =) i happen to like this month's copy.. i kinda laughed myself silly with all the jokes.. and there were some touching stories inside too.... go get a copy yourself and read =) *promotes Reader's Digest* ahahaha i did promote it during my ethics presentation too! hahahaha...

oh yeah, Valentine's Day is coming.. and it falls on the first day of Chinese New Year.. hahaha... my classmate actually made a valentine's day card for his girlfriend.. i took picture of it but i don't think i should post it up here.. haha. it is really nice though... he made her the pop-up card which i taught the class to make last year during my demo speech... awwwwww.... how sweet is that.. and he did it very well indeed... when i saw it, i went Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww..... and yeah, his girlfriend is one very lucky girl to have someone who would go through the trouble of buying papers, finding a craft punch and most importantly use his precious time to make the card for her... Well, i am actually glad that i could help him in a way.. =)

Oh yeah! Ehsan's Murtabak is sehr YUMMY!!! hahaha... i haven't had murtabak like in ages.. hahah! since since since... i cannot remember.. see how long ago that was.. =P haha! well i managed to cut down on my rice intake.. because rice=fats !!! hahaha and i didn't go to the gym this thursday.. arhhhhh!!! never mind. i will go there after bio test this wednesday.. GYM HERE I COME!!! haha.. playing with fonts here! There was this dedication thingy going on for CNY.. it is like in secondary school.. just that this one half the profits go to charity.. i think.. or something like that la.. i dedicated something to Kiran (my physics mentor) ahhahaa for all the times she helped me in my physics.. =) Thank you Kiran. hehe.. might as well say thank you here too! hahaaha well, she has put up with me being annoying especially when physics test/exam is around the corner.. me asking her 1001 questions.. and she has to crack her brain to give me 1001 answers =P anyway, thanks Kiran!!! =)

I can't believe that is already Friday! Soon it'll be Sunday and Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday.. And then Thursday.. I so hope that i'll get to watch VALENTINE'S DAY MOVIE !!! Vivien (my wonderful roommate) booked me!! hahahah =P The much awaited movie!! star-studded.. ahahhaha!! Taylor Lautner!!! Muscles and more muscles!! Even Vivien agrees with me! we think that his muscles are just nice and not over the top.. and he has a pretty face to go with it... =) ahem ahem... Fans of Taylor Lautner here!.. hahahaha!!!

This whole week... everybody or i should say that most of the people are singing this song.. Two is better than one- Boys like Girls ft. Taylor Swift... most people including me =P

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life
And I thought hey
You know this could be something
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing
So maybe it's true, that I can't live without you
Well maybe two is better than one
There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two, is better than one
I remember every look upon your face,
The way you roll your eyes, the way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everythings okay
And finally now, believing
And maybe it's true, that I can't live without you
Well maybe two is better than one
There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two, is better than one
Yeah, yeah
I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life
And I thought hey
Maybe it's true, that I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking
Oooh I can't live without you
'Cause baby two is better than one
There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And I've figured out with all that's said and done
Two, is better than one

the long walk

2010-02-05T02:23:00.001-08:00

never knew i needed

2010-01-30T18:16:00.000-08:00

Have been reading Bio since 7 something... hahah! ate breakfast while reading.. then came to a part where i didn't really get...My housemate helped me.. my understanding got better but i still don't fully understand... helpp!!!! i decided to go to my lecturer tomorrow.. =) haha! here i am now blogging.. haha and clearing my mind.. so that i have a clear mind to go back to reading about X chromosome inactivation.. ha.. and Barr body and anhidrotic ectodermal dysplasia...and Variation in humans.. hahah! decided to listen to this song.. a very nice song from the princess and the frog soundtrack... =)

Never knew i needed- Neyo

oooh

for the way you changed my plans

for being the perfect distraction

for the way u took the idea that I had of everything that I wanted to have

and made me see there was somethin missing

ooh yeah

for the ending of my first begin

ooh yeah yeah
ooh yeah yeah

and for the rare and unexpected friend

ooh yeah yeah

for the way you're something that I'd never choose

but at the same time something I don't wanna lose

and never wanna be without ever again

you're the best thing I never knew I needed

said when u appeared

I had no idea

you're the best thing I never knew I needed

now it's so clear I need you here always

my accidental happily ever after

the way you smile and how you comfort me

with your laughter

I must admit you were not a part of my book

but now if you open it up and take a look

you're the beginning and the end of every chapter

oooh

you're the best thing I never knew I needed

said when you appeared I had no idea

you're the best thing I never knew I needed

now it's so clear I need you here always

who knew that I could be (who knew that I could be)

so unexpectedly(so unexpectedly)

undeniably happier

said with you right here right here next to me

coz you're the best thing I never knew I needed

said I needed

said when you appeared I had no idea

you're the best thing I never knew I needed

now it's so clear I need you here always(x2)

the week.

2010-01-30T03:04:00.001-08:00

I am so looking forward to monday! I bought new heels from Ole-ole (a place near my hostel).. adorned with black straps it stands tall and proud on my shoe rack... it was only RM29.90... hehe.. what a price for heels.. and those are some nice heels... =) love it. At least i don't have to wear my "ballet" shoes anymore.. as those really hurt my toes.. let's hope the heels won't hurt my feet.. I'll be wearing it on mondays and maybe fridays as i have to wear baju kurungs on both days.. =) it is a shame i forgot to take a picture of it... haha!

The past week:

Monday: Migraine migraine migraine!!!! but after german i had dinner wih Lay to celebrate her birthday.... surprised her with two slices of cake.. for her and Q-En. =)

Tuesday: Migraine migraine migraine and more migraine... again!!! Felt better after taking panadol... and realised that i was out of panadol.. haha

Wednesday: Frau Maria showed us a video of Christmas time in German... it was sehr schoon!!! (very beautiful in German)

Thursday: Speaking test started... with the first 12 people.. i am no. 14!....

Friday: Speaking test.. for part 3, my question was quite tough. well, i did my best. it is up to the lecturer to grade me..

Saturday: Migraine... again! this time no panadol.. went to bed for 15 minutes... studied a bit of bio and now i am on the laptop again..and i think that it is going to rain soon... nooooo!!! Don't rain!!! okay it is raining... hahahah!

I found this picture on the net... beautiful ain't it?

Roller coaster

2010-01-23T09:16:00.002-08:00

The past week has been another roller coaster ride... well, of course... i am always on this roller coaster. my personal thriller ride. I realised that the roller coaster started when I started college. And let me tell you. It is the BEST ride I've ever had so far.. not to mention the most thrilling too! The ups are simply breathtaking and the downs very very horrifying. All the turns... right and left are simply amazing... Sure, my roller coaster has made some wrong turns and yeah, I got lost. But hey, sometimes we need to get lost to be found. The certain someone, the only someone who possess the power to put me back on the right path. It dawned upon me that I have been on this roller coaster ride ever since I was born but I never noticed I was riding it until now. Looking back at the past week, many things did happen. I discovered new things... that i have never known.. about people and about myself. Slowly, everything is beginning to unfold.. and i know that time flies.. and soon enough the roller coaster is going to make a huge plunge.. Am I ready for this plunge? I think I am. However high the plunge is. I am going to take it and let my breath be taken away once more.. Come what may. God be with me.

2010-01-15T07:38:00.001-08:00

FINE. let it be that way.

the new year!

2009-12-31T09:04:00.000-08:00

it is the New Year!! 2010!! time flies!! we shall not celebrate it as the end of 2009 but the beginning of something new.. a new year! and i am still up.. hahaha what on earth am i doing up?? hahaha never mind that.. let's move on.. 2009 has been a roller coaster ride... with the ups and downs and the emotions... but thank God that it is yesterday, and that today is the beginning of a wonderful year.. apparently, Fione is still up!! hahah! =) my sister is sitting in front of me... watching ben 10 .. so EARLY in the morning.. and she's texting someone.. *wonders* hahahaha my goodnesss... hahaha! anyway, HAPPY 2010 to ALL my friends out there... wherever you guys are.. be it Phuket or KL or Penang itself.... may 2010 be a blast for you!!! God Bless all of You! =)
i am sure that the year 2010 will be an adventure for all of us...

anyway i wanted to upload some pictures that i took on that day at the beach, Teluk Kumbar, to be exact.. had seafood with the whole family... not exactly whole.. but you get the idea... hahahaha just a beautiful evening with my maternal grandparents' and my family... the seafood there is good.... yummy!!! because it is fresh and i like the way they cook it... nice nice... especially the way they cook the mantis prawn.. YUMMY!!! hahahahaa ... since the pictures are taking forever to upload... they'll be in the next post!!! hahaha! *Smiles*

goodnight/ good morning!! =)

the outing

2009-12-19T21:36:00.000-08:00

*me before the outing*
*jinq mey eating her tom yam noodles*

*my lunch*

*jeslyn's king-sized sausages*

*fione's barbeque chicken*

*fione pointing the knife at me for wanting to take her picture*

*me in front of toys r' us*

*the twins- amanda and alethea*

*gwen with her money*

*cass and fione*

*gwen eating her dinner*

*shepherd's pie... my dinner... yummy!!!*

*mey and I* hehehe

*kimmie and I*

*gwen and amanda watching the "chubby midnight bunny" *

*gwen*

*wonders who is Mey texting*

*cass and fione*

*kimmie and I- full body shot* =P hahaha

*mey and I- another full body shot*

it was the day of days and the night of nights. for once, we managed to gather most of us for this outing... haha! unfortunately, Jiaps couldn't make it as she is in kl. Let's see, I arrived at 11 because my mum had an appointment... somewhere near Gurney... there was a massive jam near Esplanade and she was late already... sorry mum... you had to drop me off first.. but then she managed to reach... safely... but 20 minutes late. Well, better late than never. =)

I was walking around mph, looking at designs... getting ideas... and Jeslyn called. At 12 she came and we started talking and went off looking for presents! haha... bought nothing.. haha! =P

we walked around Gurney while waiting for the rest to arrive, impatiently because we were hungry. =P haha.

after much discussion and consideration, we went into Manila Place.. my first time =) okay. so lunch was nice and we walked out of there feeling full... after that, we went to the arcade... as we were so lazy to use the escalators, we used the lift. I haven't been to the arcade in ages! hahaha. So, we raced, played drums, danced and danced some more.... not forgetting air hockey.. hhaa! won Mey 7-3... until fione interfered.... hahaha she made the score even and asked mey to let her win. hahah! cass joined us at the arcade... and jeslyn had to leave after a while..

then all of us went to mph to buy some stuff... to make presents! =) hahah! Kim and Mey went to winter warmers... Cass and Amanda left me and fione at mph.. haha they went to popular... i followed fione to collect her camera and we went to popular.. bought some more stuff there...

when all of us met up again, we decided to go to Northam Beach to have dinner.. hahaha my feet were killing me at that moment..

three cars drove to Northam Beach. =) and there we were sitting...eating and talking... and after dinner, taking pictures of us! =) and we watched the "Chubby-midnight-bunny" video. haha on fione's phone..

i forgot how we came to the decision to hang out at fione's place before going back.. hahah! we were there until 10.45 ... hahahah! her parents went out to buy apoms/apungs for us.. hahah! and rojak! Yummy.. Thank you, Aunty and Uncle. =) hehe.

btw, mey had two accidents that night... her "P" fell off and her bumper kinda went in a lil...

hope everything is alright with you!! =) *smiles*

i was prepared for grilling before i went home.. my last words were *secret* ahahha! =) actually, my last words were "bye and drive safely yeah" to mey before i met my daddy. =0

but not much grilling... hahaha they were tired and sleepy. =) thank goodness...

What a day!

Me

2009-12-17T01:17:00.000-08:00

*vanessa*

school

2009-12-15T18:28:00.000-08:00

*where it all started*
*5 Science 1- took this on the last day of school*

*class shirts*

*us and bikes*

the funniest part of all- climbing up there

playing with the bikes...in school...

everybody say HOT!!

*from top: Me, Jiaps,Kimmie, Mey, Amy and Ade

*Shanese and I during Exposure Camp 2008...the walk from GGA to youth park*

*of poles and laughter*

*the last meal in school before SPM*
*me in front of the lockers*

*Fione and I in Nandos on my 18th birthday..awww.. *

*jia pey and I (brace face) .. hehehe this was taken way back... 2006*

*viityaa and I in the school canteen*
top (from left): jiaps, Me, kimmie, mey. Bottom (from left): Jeslyn, Siew Wern, Cheryl

the pictures are from last year.. was just browsing through some pictures on my laptop and came across all these pictures.. lol.. made me think of my life in school... i picked out a few pictures and decided to post here.. because there were too many! hahaha

missing them loads! =)

i don't know how to save a life

2009-12-15T18:23:00.001-08:00

The Fray- how to save a life

Step one you say, "We need to talk."
He walks, you say, "Sit down, it’s just a talk."
He smiles politely back at you,
You stare politely right on through,
Some sort of window to your right.
As he goes left and you stay right,
Between the lines of fear and blame,
You begin to wonder why you came.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend,
Somewhere along in the bitterness.
And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.
Let him know that you know best,
'Cause after all you do know best.
Try to slip past his defense,
Without granting innocence.
Lay down a list of what is wrong.
The things you’ve told him all along.
Pray to god he hears you.
And I pray to god he hears you and,
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend,
Somewhere along in the bitterness.
And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.
As he begins to raise his voice,
You lower yours and grant him one last choice.
"Drive until you lose the road,
Or break with the ones you’ve followed."
He will do one of two things.
He will admit to everything,
Or he’ll say he’s just not the same,
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend,
Somewhere along in the bitterness.
And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend,
Somewhere along in the bitterness.
And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.
How to save a life.
How to save a life.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend,
Somewhere along in the bitterness.
And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend,
Somewhere along in the bitterness.
And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.
How to save a life.
How to save a life.

things happen... yes, things do happen. but i don't how to handle things like these.. how do i save a life??

Ave Maria- Beyonce

2009-12-10T06:48:00.000-08:00

Ave Maria- Beyonce

She was lost in so many different ways
Out in the darkness with no guide
I know the cost of a losing hand
Never for the grace of God oh I
I found heaven on earth
You were my last, my first
And then I hear this voice inside
Ave Maria
I've been alone
When I'm surrounded by friends
How could the silence be so loud
But I still go home knowing that I've got you
There's only us when the lights go down
You are my heaven on earth
You are my hunger, my thirst
I always hear this voice inside
Saying Ave Maria
Sometimes love can come and pass you by
While your busy making plans
Suddenly hit you and then you realize
It's out of your hands, baby you got to understand
You are my heaven on earth
You are my last, my first
And then I hear this voice inside
Ave Maria
Ave Maria
Ave Maria

I knew you could do it. haha I've always known that =)

sweet dreams

2009-12-09T02:53:00.000-08:00

Beyonce- Sweet dreams

(Turn The Lights On)
Every night I rush to my bed
With hopes that maybe I’ll get a chance to see you
When i close my eyes
I’m going out of my head
Lost in a fairytale
Can you hold my hands and be my guide
Clouds filled with stars cover your skies
And I hope it rains
You’re the perfect lullaby
What kinda dream is this?
You could be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you
(Turn The Lights On)
Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Somebody pinch me, your love's too good to be true
(Turn The Lights On)
My guilty pleasure I ain't going no where
Baby long as you're here
I’ll be floating on air cause you're my
You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you
(Turn The Lights On)
I mention you when I say my prayers
I wrap you around all of my thoughts
Boy you're my temporary high
I wish that when I wake up you’re there
To wrap your arms around me for real
And tell me you’ll stay by side
Clouds filled with stars cover your skies
And I hope it rains
You’re the perfect lullaby
What kinda dream is this
You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you
(Turn The Lights On)
Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Somebody pinch me, your love's too good to be true
(Turn The Lights On)
My guilty pleasure I ain't going no where,
Baby long as you're here
I’ll be floating on air cause you're my
You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you
(Turn The Lights On)
Tattoo your name across my heart
So it will remain
Not even death can make us part
What kind of dream is this?
You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you
(Turn The Lights On)
Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Somebody pinch me, your love's too good to be true
(Turn The Lights On)
My guilty pleasure I ain't going no where
Baby long as you're here
I’ll be floating on air cause you're my,
You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you (Turn The Lights On)
(Turn the lights off)

Random

2009-12-04T07:10:00.000-08:00

*of thoughts and warmth* just a random post here.. =) *smiles*

New Moon

2009-12-02T05:56:00.000-08:00

Thoughts were rushing through my head as I walked out of the cinema with Fione. If I am not wrong, her exact words were "Are we really supposed to go out this way? Why go out the same way we came in?" My head started spinning, my whole body aching. New moon was a nice movie, in fact, a fantastic one. The only thing that was keeping me from totally enjoying the movie was the uncomfortable seats in the cinema. The cinema was a huge one.. But then, the seats were awfully uncomfortable. I was fidgetting throughout the whole movie, turning right and left, sitting up straight and of course, sliding down. However, I could not afford to slide down too much as there was very very little space for our legs. Well, before the movie, Fione and I went to the beach.. Sorry, no photos yet.. They are all in her phone. Hehe. Tough luck, one side of my flats got washed away.. haha.. It is somewhere in the middle of the sea now. I stood on the beach for 10 minutes at least, hoping that the tide will wash my slipper back. Sadly, its gone. Now all I have is one side of my white flats. Bought them at Pulau Tikus market sometime this year. *sobs* We went for pizza after our "walk" at the beach. Couldn't finish the pizza. Then it was New Moon time. Those who walked past us kept staring at our shirts because we were wearing "I Love Jacob" t-shirts. A stranger came up to us and said :

Stranger: Well, Jacob must bea very lucky guy to have two lovely ladies loving him
Fione and Vanessa: *laughs*

Awkward but funny.

After the movie was horrible. My tummy was aching very very badly. Fione suggested to go to Coffee Island so that I can have a hot drink. As if my day couldn't get any worse, there was a torrential downpour. So, cold and in pain I was sitting at Coffee Island sipping my caramel chocolate drink. I thank Fione for being so nice by driving her car and parking right in front of Coffee Island so that I didn't have to walk so far. On the way back, there was a terrible jam. Cars were honking and there I was, in pain. Luckily, I brought my batik skirt. I was having chills... Yes, even when Fione turned her cold air cond to hot air cond. It was terrible..I had to ask my grandpa to pick me uo from Fione's place as I could not really walk.. Those aches were terrible.. So I went to the clinic after I met up with my mummy at Yamaha.. I waited for the doctor to arrive alone as my mummy had to drop my sister off to tuition... There I was shivering and moaning and groaning...When it was finally my turn... I was relieved..

Doctor: Yes, what can I do for you today young lady?
Me: I am half-dead.
Doctor: Are you sure? Because if you are half dead, then I have to call the ambulance..Now tell me what is wrong...
Me: Everywhere hurts; my head, my stomach, my joints.... practically my whole entire body.
And I lost my appetite.
Doctor: You do have a temperature..Quite high... And your ears are extremely red..Any sign of
rash anywhere?
Me: Not that I know of.
Doctor: *checks stomach* Hmmm... Your intestines are hyperactive.. and you have gastritis..
This might be a suspected case of Denggue or Chikungunya with the aches and all. The
symptoms don't manifest early. Even with blood tests, the results will be negative for
now. If your fever persists, you have to get to the hospital to be under observation.
I'll give you something for your stomach... *smiles* Get well soon.
Me: Thank you *smiles back and walks out slowly*

That night was horrible... I barely slept... With the aches and fever.. Whatever disease that is, I will never want to get it...Never ever ever again...

Feeling much better today.. Let's hope I get better *smiles* ...

My current addiction. next to chocolates.

2009-11-29T18:43:00.000-08:00

A few stolen moments,
is all that we shared
You've got your family,
and they need you there
Though I try to resist,
being last on your list
But no other man's gonna do
So I'm saving all my love for you
It's not very easy,
living all alone
My friends try and tell me,
find a man of my own
But each time I try,
I just break down and cry
Cause I'd rather be home feeling blue
So I'm saving all my love for you
You use to tell me,
we'd run away together
Love gives you the right to be free
You said be patient,
just wait a little longer
But that's just an old fantasy
I've got to get ready,
just a few minutes more
Gonna get that old feeling
When you walk through that door
Cause tonight is the night for feeling alright
We'll be making love the whole night through
So, I'm saving all my love
Yes, I'm saving all my love
Yes, I'm saving all my love for you
No other women is gonna love you more
Cause tonight is the night
That I'm feeling alright
We'll be making love the whole night through
So, I'm saving all my love
Yes, I'm savin all my loving
Yes, I'm saving all my love for you
For you
For you

So close -Jon Mclaughlin

2009-11-29T00:08:00.000-08:00

You're in my arms
And all the world is gone
The music playing on
For only two
So close togehter
And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive
A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid mine goodbye
And never knew
So close with waiting
Waiting here with you
And now, forever, I know
All that I want is to hold you
So close
So close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Now you're beside me
And look how far we've come
So far
We are
So close...
Oh, how could I face these faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We're so close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Let's go on dreaming
Though we know we are
So close
So close, and still
So far...

Help.

2009-11-28T04:35:00.000-08:00

Honestly, I don't think I can survive this. I just don't have that kind of strength. I just don't. I seriously don't.

Life

2009-11-27T20:27:00.000-08:00

hmmm... It has been a long time since I wrote here.. Well, things have been pretty messed up lately and now I am trying my very best to make everything alright. Mentally, of course. I have felt feelings that I have never felt before throughout my entire life, experienced adventures that I never thought I would experience, heard things that I never thought I would hear. It has been a roller coaster ride for the past few weeks. I had so many things playing in my mind, intertwining to be exact. Some of them are like movies, replaying themselves. Some good, some bad. But I know that I cannot run away from all these, much as I want to. It is like I am standing right there on the battlefield, ready for war and I feel like running away. Part of me is asking me to give up. However, there is something in me that is asking me to run forward, not backward. To run or not to run... It is like I came to this crossroad.. Not knowing which way to take. At that point, I don't know what to do. Questions popped into my mind. Many questions. Related and unrelated. Too many. I couldn't take it anymore. Ubiquitous voices were saying "choose". I couldn't decide. I cannot decide. I stood there, hands over my ears as the voices overwhelmed me. My chest tightening, my legs giving way, my mind swirling. I felt something piercing through my heart.. The excruciating pain. Gripping my chest, I know I have to stand up and face reality.. cold, harsh reality. You were with me all the way.. All the way. I gave myself to you. And so I took the road not taken because although it is painful, it seemed like the right thing to do. Now, all I can do is to pray... hard.

Back home

2009-08-21T17:31:00.001-07:00

Finally, I am back where I came from!!! For one week..Mid-sem break. I reached Penang at 12.15 or somewhere near there. I left Puduraya at 6 something. The area was congested and it was quite a while before we actually left KL. Well, the most important thing is that I am back in Penang and I am loving it!! I am going to havea bowl of hokkien mee later.. I miss Penang food. I think I wanna take a break from rice as I have been eating rice everyday for the past two weeks.... well, almost everyday. During the weekend, my aunt took me out to eat as I stayed at her place. I had tomyam soup and a few dishes last friday.. On saturday I had ham sandwich for breakfast and spaghetti for lunch. Well, my aunt took me to eat crabs for dinner.. my gosh. they were delicious!!!! I loved it. haha. Then on sunday, she took me to Old Town for breakfast..I had their nasi lemak.. It was delicious... as always..

Yesterday when I reached home, I was so relieved. I was at this point where the feeling of being home escalates to a point where I don't feel like going back to shah alam ever again. but i know that I have to no matter what. Well, now that iI've got used to the place, I find that it is not a bad place after all... haha! oh well... =)

ciao!

Classes

2009-08-10T06:28:00.000-07:00

I haven't been online for a few days now. I finally got the chance to do so. And I realised that my blog was left unattended... abandoned for the past 2 weeks or so.
First things first... Chemistry Test is postponed!! ahaha... Until after the mid-sem break which is from the 21st of august-31st of august.
here is a list of subjects that i am taking:
1) Biology
2)Chemistry
3) Physics
4) English
5) German
6) Ethics..

I know that my schedule is a little bit too packed but I don't mind. I asked for it. Nobody forced me to take German. Initially, I wanted to take math.. but luckily i didn't because i don't think that i can cope with the timetable. Well, I asked my classmates... and no one seemed to take math. They were all contempted with 3 subjects. Then when my roommate told me that we have to arrange our time for Maths Class ourselves. I thought it over and found that it will be very tiring. I am already very tired after coming back from class everyday. Imagine me taking math!!! ahahaha.....

German classes are very enjoyable. I Love the lecturer. Well, more like the way she teaches us. I guess i got to go already... Bye bye!!!! =)

True- Ryan Cabrera

2009-07-25T16:40:00.000-07:00

True- Ryan Cabrera

I won't talk

I won't breathe

I won't move till you finally see

That you belong with me

You might think I don't look

But deep inside the corner of my mind

I'm attatched to you

mmmm..I'm weak, it's true

Cause I'm afraid to know the answer

Do you want me too?

Cause my heart keeps falling faster

[chorus]I've waited all my life to cross this line

To the only thing that's true

So I will not hide

It's time to try anything to be with you

All my life I've waited

This is true

You don't know what you do

Everytime you walk into the room

I'm afraid to move

I'm weak, it's true

I'm just scared to know the ending

Do you see me too?

Do you even know you met me?

[Chorus]I've waited all my life to cross this line

To the only thing thats true

So I will not hide

It's time to try anything to be with you

All my life I've waited

This is true

I know when I go

I'll be on my way to you

The way that's true

[chorus]I've waited all my life to cross this line

To the only thing thats true

So I will not hide

It's time to try anything to be with you

All my life I've waited

This is true

my stay here

2009-07-15T00:15:00.000-07:00

Well, this is my third week at INTEC and I daresay that I have grown accustomed to the

place here.. I made loads of new friends and my classmates are awesome. May i repeat?

A-W-E-S-O-M-E

They're outgoing and they'll help others a lot.

Like yesterday, my chemistry experiment went awry.

We were supposed to prepare nickel sulphate from nickel carbonate and sulphuric acid.

My partner (Kiran) and I, we heated the mixture fof nickel carbonate and sulphuric acid for

too long and then the mixture started to crystallise..

well, it is not supposed to do that until we filter and leave it to crystallise...

when it was boiling, it started crystallising ... Kiran and I were wondering why our mixture is less than half whereas other groups' mixture is still more than half.

Then one guy from the other group came over to help us..

When my lecturer passed by, she was like "you heated it for too long already. there is an hour left. You have enough time to do anoter experiment"

So I went to weigh the nickel carbonate and Kiran went to pour the sulphuric acid into the beaker.

We started mixing all over again.

When a few of the other people saw us doing that as they walked past.. they gave us some pointers on how to perform the experiment.

One by one.. some members of other groups came to help us.

Nice people right?

I am sort of having fun here la.

My housemates are wonderful people too!!!

Geraldine, Peggy (my housemates), Shafern, Vivian, J-Xi, Stephanie and I will eat dinner together most of the time.

well... Shafern joins us occasionally.. when she does not go for training.

Alright... i have loads of homework to do!!

I'll update when I am free!! =)

p/s: je t'aime

Today

2009-07-10T06:24:00.000-07:00

Today I went to Sunway Pyramid with Geraldine and Vivian. Well, I daresay that we had fun

riding the KTM and bus... waiting at the stations..

maybe not waiting at the stations.. but when you're with friends, you don't feel the length of waiting..

like that day when I went to Mid Valley with Shafern, we talked and talked on the KTM

and we didn't even realise that time FLEW past us...

I had a few experiences riding the KTM...

Shafern would know what I mean.

ahaha...

okay.. back to today...

after Sunway, we went to dinner at Kolej Cemara.

i had kuey teow kungfu.. It is scrumptious.

then Vivian and I waited outside of Mydin for Geraldine and J-Xi to buy some stuff..

I bought this dvd...the Cinderella story...

i was like "i haven't watched this in years"

ahahaha.... so yeah.. i am watching it now.

haha

toodles! =)

p/s: i love you

orientation

2009-07-03T17:08:00.000-07:00

Sunday

Registration

Get our apartment units (Kolej Akasia-Girls' Hostel) and met with housemates

Taklimat HEP (Hal Ehwal Pelajar) and MMS (Minggu Mesra Siswa)

Taklimat Kolej

Monday
Breakfast
Registration at INTEC
Taklimat by JPA
Bersama PPP dan JPK

Tuesday
Breakfast
LDK (grouping)
GAMES FOR THE WHOLE DAY

Wednesday
Breakfast
LDK (Value Added-More GAMES!!!)
Talk on Kecemerlangan dan Hala Tuju

Thursday
Majlis Amanat Pengarah dan Aku Janji Pelajar

Friday
Woke up late... 7.40. and I had Placement Test at 8.30

vanessa: (wakes up and looks at phone-56 misscalls and 5 messages, and looks at the time)
(screams SHAFERN ITS 7.40 ALREADY!!!!)
Shafern jumps out of bed and looks at her clock..
Shafern: No la, 6.30 only.
Vanessa: its 7.40!!!
Then the both of us rushed to get ready.. in 5 minutes time we were already downstairs running to the bus to go to INTEC.

Orientation was damn fun. I loved LDK the most. That's when they split us into groups and we'll be doing group activities for the whole day... My group members are extremely friendly and I had a wonderful time with them for the two days. This intake, we had 700+ students. We're divded into A-Levels Medicine, A-Levels German, A-Levels UK, American Degree Foundation Programme, AUSMAT... i think this is all. A-Levels Medicine had the most number of students. =) Well, there was like this Makan Malam Bersama PPP dan JPK where one team will represent the whole course to perform on stage. The sketch by the AUSMAT-ians was damn funny and nice as it portrayed our first five days there. =) Then the facilitators presented something for us as well... we were shouting "Encore! Encore! Encore!" haha!

I know that the 2 years there will be indefinitely tough on me. but I am determined to stay on. After all, this is the only path to my dream. For this weekend, I'm back in Penang. Happy to be home!!!! After 6 hours of sitting in the bus.... The bus stopped a Butterworth and asked us to switch bus!! I stared at the bus driver!!! hahaha! Classes start on wednesday and on tuesday, we have LOU (Letter of Understanding). I think it is when we will meet up with our lecturers. Okay. I have to go. Chao. =)

hostel life

2009-07-02T06:22:00.000-07:00

So this is my fifth day at INTEC, UITM. There are only 3 words to describe the

MMS (Minggu Mesra Siswa) programme..

Fun, Fun and Fun.

Although we slept late almost every night..

I slept at 1 for almost every night and wake up at 5.30 every morning.

Why so early?

because we have to catch the bus to the campus..

the hostels are in section 18 whereas INTEC is in section 17.

it is around 8-10 minutes away.

There is like Mydin, Giant, Ole-ole... around my hostel.

so food, groceries, photostating, and stuff like that will not be a problem.

I went exploring the place with my roommates today. haha

I don't know what else to say here..

will update more in the future! =)

p/s: je t'aime.

of food and fun

2009-06-21T17:58:00.000-07:00

Last Friday, I went to Gurney with Viityaa (she doesn't like me to publicise her nickname here *winks*). While I was waiting for her to come, I went to Watson's to do my shopping. You know, she was like LOST when she arrived at Gurney. I was in F.O.S when she called me.

Vanessa: Hello, where are you?

Viityaa: Erm... Ground Floor. I just came in. You?

Vanessa: Meet me at F.O.S

Viityaa: I don't really know where is F.O.S

Vanessa: *smacks forehead* okay. you go up the escalator and I'll meet you there.

(takes the escalator down to the second floor)

Then, we went to Popular. We bought so many things there, that we couldn't carry them. So I had to grab a basket from the counter. *dump dump dump* There everything goes into the basket. Then we went to Reject Shop to look for my long sleeve shirt with collar... Well I found one. RM 8.95 ( I know that I am cheapskate..hehe but it is money saving) We met Gwen, Ben and their friend as they were about to go down the escalator. Well, Gwen didn't go down yet... the guys had to run up the escalator. haha! XD

Guess what Viityaa and I had for lunch.. haha. We went to 3 places. First, we went to Leomag to have waffles, the apple turnover. Yummy. Then, we went to Wembrey Park to meet Cheryl, Amanda, Siew Wern and some friends. After that, we went to Kim Gary to eat chicken wings.. well, baked chicken wings with cheese... oh the goodness of cheese!! *drools* ...Then we went to secret recipe to have a slice of carrot cake. It was gooooood!!! Well... I don't mind eating so much, since its my last week in Penang!!! Ahhhhhh! I had fun la.

Father's Day

2009-06-21T02:14:00.000-07:00

4 more days in Penang.
Hmmm... What shall I do?

I have been packing and sorting documents all day...!!!
by the way.. today is FATHER"S DAY!!!
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, DADDY!!! =)
Well, today, we spent Father's Day at home.. haha!
My dad slept for the whole afternoon.
haha!

The weather has been insane these few days!!
when it is HOT, it is REALLY hot...
When it is raining, it pours!!!

=) but i am enjoying the weather in Penang before i leave!!

Random-ness

2009-06-19T18:18:00.000-07:00

Think of me

Think of me,

think of me fondly,

when we've said goodbye

Remember me once in a while please promise me you'll try

When you find that once again you long to take your heart back and be free

If you ever find a moment, spare a thought for me...

We never said our love was evergreen or as unchanging as the sea

But if you can still remember, stop and think of me

Think of all the things we've shared and seen

Don't think about the way things might have been...

Think of me, think of me waking, silent and resigned

Imagine me, trying too hard to put you from my mind

Recall those days.

Look back on all those times.

Think of the things we'll never do

There will never be a day when I won't think of you

Flowers fade, the fruits of summer fade.

They have their season, so do we.

But please promise me that sometimes, you will think of me.

p/s: je t'aime

the time of our lives

2009-06-14T16:32:00.000-07:00

I had a marvellous time at Queens yesterday!! =)

wouldn't trade for anything else in the world.

'neway... I watched 17 again... again

haha.

I like that movie..

Well, after yesterday, I won't be seeing you for another 5 weeks.

Don't worry. I'll be patient. =)

p/s: Je t'aime.

The Outing

2009-06-10T05:38:00.001-07:00

Woke up at 8 today!!! but then i slept at 1.30 last night.

was tossing and turning in my bed.

Don't ask me why.

Well, i nuah-ed on the bed for like another 20 minutes before actually getting up

My mother gave me the you-look-terrible look because my hair was all over the place.

hehe!

Mum: Why today wake up so late? (because my usual waking up time is 5.50.a.m)

Vanessa: I don't know wor. I couldn't sleep last night. Slept at 1.30 this morning.

Mum: *fumes and then continues watching tv*

Well, today, I went to Gurney with Junie when I bumped into Amanda..

She was waiting for Gwen at Nando's (on the second floor)

Gwen happened to be waiting for Amanda at Nando's too.

The only difference is that Gwen was at the first floor.

hahaha!

Gwen...gwen... gwen.. tsk tsk

Then they joined us for lunch.

Guess what I had for lunch?

S-a-l-a-d

the portion was HUGE!!!

Anyway.. after lunch... we HIT the arcade!!!

There were so many people in the arcade

It's like Tokyo in there!

I made Gwen play air hockey with me

It was a draw.

8-8

hahaha!

Then we raided Toys R' Us.

To be exact, we RAIDED the soft toy department.

and then went over to the baby department.

Gwen said that we were like some expecting mothers..

haha!!

Friends like these are forever! =)

p/s: I love you!

Junie's Birthday

2009-06-09T06:34:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to you,

Happy Birthday to you,

Happy Birthday to Junie,

Happy Birthday to you .

Today, 9th of June, happens to be one of my oldest pal's birthday!!!

JUNIE ONG!!

Junie, I have known you since I was 10. I could still remember that

we were lining up for ice cream..

I turned behind and saw you...

Immediately, i recognized you as you were in the same class as me

haha!!

We've been through a lot ever since then.

Now we're both 18.. gee.. how time flies!!! =)

soon I'll be attending your wedding!! hhaha.. just kidding. =)

But remember to invite me you know!

haha

You're doing well in college, i see..

Good job. Keep it up.

Good luck in becoming a psychologist.

As long as you don't become psycho can adee k?

I'll happily send you to tanjung rambutan!!! haha

Once again.

Happy Birthday!

Loves,

vanessa

2009-06-06T20:39:00.000-07:00

To do list for the whole of next week

1. Go to General Hospital for medical check up

2. Sort out documents

3. cut hair!!

4. Buy my stuff

5. Go to gurney

6. Prepare everything

6. Remember to buy biscuits

7. Help grandma in the kitchen

8. Spend more time with family

9. Do math and read chemistry

Sigh. No matter. I am still going to make the most out of it.

p/s: i love you. No one else has fit so perfectly.

bla bla

2009-06-06T08:46:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to get used to sleeping late and waking up early

when i go to KL, it'll be like this.

no matter.

now i changed some of my old habits

-I shower with cold water every morning

- I sleep late and wake up early

well, I decided to update my blog since I am not sleeping for the moment

I am currently doing 4 things at a time

-chatting with my friends and cousin

- watching 'the other boelyn girl (not really paying attention to it)

- Updating my blog

- talking to fione on the phone

haha!

Well, today was fun! I enjoyed it.

neway, toodles!!

p/s: I love you! =)

Can't fight this feeling anymore

2009-06-03T05:35:00.000-07:00

I can't fight this feeling any longer

And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow

What started out as friendship,

has grown stronger I only wish I had the strength to let it show

I tell myself that I can't hold out forever

I say there is no reason for my fear

'Cause I feel so secure when we're together

You give my life direction

You make everything so clear

And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight

You're a candle in the window

On a cold, dark winter's night

And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore

I've forgotten what I started fighting for

It's time to bring this ship into the shore

And throw away the oars forever

Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore

I've forgotten what I started fighting for

And if I have to crawl upon the floor

Come crashing through your door

Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore

My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you

I've been running round in circles in my mind

And it always seems that I'm following you, girl

'Cause you take me to the places that alone I'd never find

And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight

You're a candle in the window on a cold,

dark winter's night

And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore

I've forgotten what I started fighting for

It's time to bring this ship into the shore

And throw away the oars forever

'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore

I've forgotten what I started fighting for

And if I have to crawl upon the floor

Come crashing through your door

Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore.

I love this song!!! Remember it?

8 more days!!!! ahhhh!!!

2009-06-03T05:24:00.000-07:00

well, i was looking through the registration forms for UITM

I am finally going to LEAVE home.

*sniff* *sniff*

I've always talked bout how desperate I am to leave home

but now that i think about it...

I DON'T WANNA LEAVE!!!!

MUMMY!!! DADDY!!!

I think I'll scratch the floor as they drag me into the college..

haha!

But seriously...

Never mind.

I just hope the i can come back as often as possible.

i have a lot of PRAWNS BEHIND STONES (udang di sebalik batu)

"But this is your dream." says Erwyn.

Yeah. It is indeed my dream.

well.. 2.5 years isn't that bad right? ... I THINK..

Btw, I am leaving on the 28th of June...

When i see you smile

2009-05-31T18:13:00.000-07:00

When I see you smile- Bryan Adams

Sometimes I wonder
How I'd ever make it through,
Through this world without having you
I just wouldn't have a clue

'Cause sometimes it seems
Like this world's closing in on me
And there's no way of breaking free
And then I see you reach for me

Sometimes I wanna give up
I wanna give in
I wanna quit the fight
And then I see you, baby
And everything's all right
Everything's all right

When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile
baby when I see you smile at me

Oh yeah
Baby there's nothing
In this world that could ever do
What a touch of your hand can do
It's like nothing that I ever knew

And when the rain is falling
I can't feel it
'Cause you're here with me now
And one look at you baby
Is all I'll ever need...
Is all I'll ever need...

(chorus)
When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile baby
baby when I see you smile at me
Sometimes I wanna give up
I wanna give in
I wanna quit the fight
Then one look at you baby
And everything's all right
Hey, everything's all right
It's all right

When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain, yeah
When I see you smile
Yeah I can face the world
Ooh, you know i can do anything now
When I see you smile, oh yeah

Baby when I see you smile
Smile at me

p/s: i love you.

The weekend

2009-05-31T17:21:00.000-07:00

Tada! my new watch!! =D. bought it last night. well someone reserved the pink version but this

one is equally nice.

I'm loving it more and more every second.

On Saturday, Viityaa got her letter from JPA.. Well she will be going to YINDIA!!!

Congrats girl!!! I am really happy for you!! =D

I know that you will study REALLY hard... as you always do..

be a good dentist arh..

I spent the whole day with Erwyn yesterday.

Watched Night at the Museum 2...

It was a good movie..

Yes, I know that you like the Tuskegees, Erwyn..

Yesterday was FUN la!

I wonder why time FLIES when we're having fun

and CRAWLS when we're not.

Well.. I hope to see you again.. soon.

I can't wait till then.

p/s: i loved the abc song in French... and i am currently addicted to IKO's.

ToOdles!

2009-05-28T19:07:00.000-07:00

My birthday was like a week ago. well, Fione wanted me to post the picture of the present

that she gave me,here..

Well, we went to have lunch at Nando's.

After that I went to Parkson to look for the diary/notebook that i liked.

but it wasn't there anymore...

*sighs but brushes off the feeling when i saw the Green Pan advertisment

I got fascinated by the Green Pan ever since they advertised in on AFC (asian food channel)

I didn't know that Parkson had it.

Well, out of fascination I took one and flipped the pan to look at the price.

Lets just say that I put the pan back on the shelve and walked off with a stunned look on my face.

haha.. then i got fascinated by forks and spoons...

I didn't even realise that i lost Fione and Viityaa.

ahaha

They found me lingering around the crockery section.

*fast forward*

If you wanna know more about what happened in between... refer to the post made

on the 21st of May..

Anyway, we were choosing donuts in Big Apple and then ...

Fione: Hey you got pad arh? I think my period came.

Vanessa: No wor.. Are you sure?

Fione: I think so. Coz i have stomach ache. I think my car got pad.. come give me my keys!

Vanessa: *rummages through bag for keys*

Fione: *grabs keys and runs*

*continued choosing donuts*

When i was eating donuts with Viityaa... Fione came up behind me and handed me a box!

with a ribbon on top saying 'happy birthday

Vanessa: FIONE ARH!!! You didn't have to get me anything

Fione: JUST OPEN IT

Vanessa: *opens the box and eyes sparkle like a little girl

Fione arh.. awwwww!!! THANK YOU!!

*hugs*

she didn't only get me the small diary/notebook.. she got me the bigger version as well..

there was a card and Penelope (a pony on crocs... Fione and I named it)

she is seriously one of the best friends that i'll ever have.

No.. i didn't forget... Erwyn gave me something very personal on sunday..

the sunday before my birthday... I'll treasure it for life. =)

Those were the best birthday presents that I'll ever have!

these presents and with those wishes from my friends...

made my birthday a memorable one! thank you!

here is the picture:

see penelope at the side?? ahha

the birthday card. =)

welcome to the world

2009-05-27T06:42:00.000-07:00

Life is unpredictable.

You never know what you will get.

Sometimes, life doesn't go your way.

well, these are the vicissitudes of life.

This doesn't mean that you have to give up..

The right attitude is to NEVER GIVE UP... EVER!!

And we must learn to NEVER RUN AWAY FROM PROBLEMS!

Running away from problems is like sweeping dust under a rug.

Soon, they will accumulate and what do you have?

-a mountain of dust under your rug waiting to be cleaned up-

(a whole load of problems there, waiting to be solved)

Don't let problems or downs get to you.

Everyone has their ups and their downs.

Everyone has their fair share of good days and bad days.

There is no such thing as 'I only experience perfect days!'

that is pure crap.

The most important thing is we must learn how to turn our downs into ups.

It is not easy. but you have to try.

Think about it, is it worth it to let your whole day be ruined because of one 'down' that happened in the morning?

No it is not worth it.

easier said than done. yeah. tell me about it.

but still.. you have to TRY.

because being depressed for the whole day isn't going to work for you.

Also, accept your mistakes and take them as lessons.

So what if you made a mistake?

We are still human.

We are not flawless. Mistakes are inevitable.

Take failure as motivation.

It will give you the push you need.

Don't dwell on the past.

What is gone, is gone.

What is done, is done.

No matter how much you want to revive the past.. you can't.

No matter how much we yearn to go back in time to undo the past... we can't.

yes. i know that it is hard to learn through our mistakes.

but we have to.

there is no easy way. we learn most of the things through the HARD way.

that way, we can learn them better.

remember the time when we were just kids and we were learning to ride our bicycles?

we had to FALL to learn how to ride.

sometimes, these minor drawbacks are there to help us to become better.

always look at the bright side of things.

throw away the negatives and embrace the positives.

Make the best out of what you have left.

if you have nothing left...

make the best out of nothing.

So, don't give up whenever you face these kind of problems!

just wear a smile and move on.

try to be positive.

it may seem hard at first but keep trying.

remember, problems are not here to stay.

TIRED TIRED TIRED

2009-05-24T00:08:00.000-07:00

i have been vacuum-ing the place for like 2 days straight..

and I AM FINALLY DONE with it!!!!

I did it all alone yesterday... but it was my own room..

today my parents helped me,

well, after i vacuum-ed for awhile.. my neck started to cramp up..

"You are seriously USELESS" said mom

and she gave me *the look*

after these two days.. I told myself that I would not buy a double storey house in the future

I DO NOT HAVE THE ENERGY TO CLEAN THE WHOLE HOUSE!!

and no, I don't want ANY maids.

Man, I'm sooo tired lar!

Anyway, I was listening to songs by Kris Allen while I was vacuuming the place up.

Heartless

Ain't No Sunshine

Kiss A Girl

No Boundaries (I love this song)

Well, I was listening to other songs too lar... namely

I am your angel- R.Kelly ft Celine Dion

If- Bread

But then, the beautiful melody of those songs were drowned by the noise made by the vacuum

No matter. I can always listen to them again =)

memories =)

2009-05-23T21:59:00.000-07:00

I am your angel- Celine Dion ft. R. Kelly

(Celine)

No mountains too high for you to climb

All you have to do,

is have some climbing faith

No river is too wide for you to make it across

All you have to do,

is believe it when you pray

(R Kelly)

And then you will see the morning will come,

and everyday will be bright as the sun

All of your fears,

cast them on me

I just want you to see

(C&R chorus)

I'll be your cloud up in the sky

I'll be your shoulder when you cry

I hear your voices when you call me

I am your Angel,

And when all hope is gone I'm here

No matter how far you are,

I'm near

It makes no difference who you are

I am your Angel,

I'm your Angel

(R Kelly)

I saw your tear drops and I heard you cry

All you need is time,

seek me and you shall find

You have everything and your still lonely

It don't have to be this way

Let me show you a better day

(Celine)

Then you will see,

the morning will come

And all of your days will be bright as the sun

So all of your fears just cast them on me

How can I make you see?

(chorus)

(R)

And when it's time to face the storm

(C)

I'll be right by your side

(R)

Grace will keep us safe and warm and I know we will survive

(C)

And when it seems as if your end is drawing near

Don't you dare give up the fight

Just put your trust beyond the sky

(chorus)

This was the song that Jia Pey, Fione, Cheryl and I wanted to sing for this quartet competition...

but we ended up singing something else..

and if i am not wrong, Jinq Mey ended up replacing Cheryl...

(i forgot the reason adee)

anyway.. we ended up singing "at the beginning- anastasia"

It was fun for all of us lar =)

I'll never forget those moments backstage.. where we were "thinking" of doing 'i feel good'

(but we didn't lar coz we're afraid of making fools out of ourselves)

'Tho we didn't win.. it was DAMN fun!!

i miss those good ol'days..

and those visits to Red Box!!!

oh oh..i gotta get back to vacuuming the house!! teehee..

A Good Day

2009-05-21T18:15:00.000-07:00

Viityaa, Fione and I spent the day in Gurney yesterday

before that... Viityaa told me that she couldn't come..

when Fione came to fetch me from school... Lo and behold..

who do I see sitting on the front seat...

None other than..

Viityaa!!

I was a little surprised as I thought that Fione had aural test.

"How can she fetch Viityaa if she had aural test? And isn't her aural test like next week??"

"Oh well, maybe Viityaa decided to meet Fione somewhere.."

*that was 'monolog dalaman'*

I got into the car and well... we headed for Gurney..

We had lunch at Nando's.. it was delicious. mmmhmmm

Fione and I

Viityaa and I

After a scrumptious lunch.. We went to the arcade ..

Played Daytona, air hockey ( I won Fione) and drums..

My arms and shoulders were aching after that..

Then came the suggestion..

"How about we go eat big apple before going to MPH?"

( i forgot who said that)

Anyway... Viityaa bought six donuts for her family.. (how sweet of her)

Looks yummy eh... haha...

It was a good day for me.. One of my best days..!!!

Thanks Fione and Viityaa

I'll Remember the both of you ALWAYS!!! =)

*loves*

American Idol Finale

2009-05-21T18:01:00.000-07:00

American Idol 2009

And you have a WINNER!!! Kris Allen!!!

Well, he sang well during the finals... I have to say that he is a unique singer..

To me, both of them have their strengths and weeknesses...

I expected Kris to win because he has a LOT of supporters...

Well, Adam did well too.. as always...

Both men were fantastic yesterday..

I loved the finale...

Too bad i could only watch it once!!!

Unlike FIONE.... Who watched it THREE times!!!

haha =)

Who will be the next American Idol?

2009-05-20T05:19:00.000-07:00

Adam Lambert

Kris Allen

It is down to Kris and Adam... Who will be the next American Idol?

Well, their performance was good tonight.. Adam awed me.. as usual ...

Kris was equally good.. so it is a tough competition..

the sad part is that I cannot watch the finals tomorrow morning..

for those of you who don't know when and what time...

it is 7.00 a.m, tomorrow, star world..

Argh!! I'm sooo excited!!

I bet I'll be up at 6 ALL EXCITED!!!

oh boy oh boy oh boy!!!

p/s: i Looooove it when Adam hits the high notes!!! =)

Badminton and The Mystery of the Missing Tennis Ball

2009-05-19T06:00:00.000-07:00

Today at approximately 11 a.m, I picked up my house phone and dialled

Permata Sports Complex's number. Well, Viityaa wanted to play badminton, so i booked

1 court from 3.00-5.00. I had to fetch her, so i decided to leave early. I don't know

what happened... i sorta.. kinda.. got lost in Farlim. In her apartment grounds. WOW! @_@

Well, I was waiting at the guard house. but she wasn't there... so i called her. she told me that was waiting at the other end. I entered the grounds and

went round and round...

Still no Viityaa..

Finally, I decided to go back to the guard house that I was waiting at... to stop and call her..

whaddya know? she was happily standing there in a red top and blue shorts!!

I was like "VIITYAAAAAA!!!!!!"

*smacks forehead*

She lenggang-ed her way to my car... correction.. my GRANDPA's car..

and i sped to Permata coz we were late..

well, when we reached.. there were a lot of people playing badminton!! my gosh

"wah today arh you sia sui lo if you don't play properly", said a voice in my head.

At first, we played on our own. Then one of the coaches asked me whether I could play with the little girl..who happens to be HALF my size but TWICE the player..!

The badminton game ended at 5.

When i reached home, Fione sms-ed me and asked me to change the booking for the

tennis court from 5.00-6.00 to 6.00-7.00. She arrived at my grandparents' place soon after.

We started playing and I SUCKED BIG TIME!! I ter-hit one ball into the

GIGANTIC longkang beside the court. Haha. Before that, Fione hit one of the balls out to the grassy area..

For 8-10 minutes we continued playing as we had one more ball.. one more miserable ball!

When i went out to look for the other ball, i found that it wasn't there anymore!

It was surprising as Fione and I watched the ball land on the grass!!!!

And it was kinda impossible for someone to pick it up because we were there and we would have seen him/her..

Fione started saying "Yer, why so spooky one?"

All I did was shrug.

We went round and round looking for the ball but it was not there.

*wooooooo*

As at 6.59.p.m on 19.05.2009, Fione officially lost all her tennis balls.

Two balls succumbed to the currents in the HUGE longkang...

as for the other one..

it mysteriously vanished into thin air

p/s: at least we didn't step on cow dung like we did two weeks ago =)

those darn funny moments with MOK

2009-05-18T20:17:00.001-07:00

Fione and I eating DURIANN!!!! my gosh... the aroma of durian filled the house!!!All the SILLY things that we did when we were eating DURIAN!!

p/s: my hands still smell of durian!=)

Doesn't it look like her lips? MUTATED MOK! Double 'M'..

*don't worry... it is just bahulu!*

Plain White T's- 1,2,3,4

2009-05-16T03:28:00.000-07:00

1 2, 1 2 3 4-
Give me more lovin' than I've ever had,
Make it all better when I'm feelin' sad,
Tell me that I'm special even when I know I'm not,
Make it feel good when I hurt so bad,
Barely gettin' mad,
I'm so glad I found you; I love bein' around you.

You make it easy,
it's easy as 1,2- 1,2,3,4
There's only 1 thing 2 do 3 words 4 you- (I love you) I love you
There's only 1 way 2 say those 3 words and that's what I'll do-(I love you)
I love you.

Give me more lovin' from the very start,
Piece me back together when I fall apart,
Tell things you never even tell your closest friends-
Make it feel good when I hurt so bad,
Best that I've had,
I'm so glad I found you,
I love bein' around you.

You make it easy,
it's easy as 1,2- 1,2,3,4
There's only 1 thing 2 do 3 words 4 you- (I love you) I love you
There's only 1 way 2 say those 3 words and that's what I'll do- (I love you)
I love you.
(I love you) I love you.

You make it easy, it's easy as 1,2- 1,2,3,4
There's only 1 thing 2 do 3 words 4 you- (I love you) I love you
There's only 1 way 2 say those 3 words and that's what I'll do- (I love you)
I love you.
(I love you) I love you
1, 2, 3, 4
(I love you) I love you
(I love you) I love you

Leaving

2009-05-09T21:04:00.000-07:00

i bet you're one step closer to realising your dream..

i know that you will do wonders while you're there,

although i may miss you but i want the best for you,

you brought meaning to my life

and i know that you will keep on doing that in your profession

i'll be here when you need me

i am just a call or message away..

like you always say... go out there and show 'em the tiger in you!

you are awesome!!

=) even if i am not there... i'll be luan-ning you from afar

like a mosquito in your ear!! lol..

you changed my life and i appreciate you doing that.

p/s: i have been listening to that song over and over again!!!!

Life These Days

2009-04-27T05:54:00.000-07:00

...How long has it been? ...

MORE THAN A MONTH!!

Considering the amount of hours I spend on the computer

each day..

I am surprised that I never thought of updating my blog.

The previous post was about SPM results...

I am thankful that the ordeal is finally over but i know that there are more to come.

I've just watched 'The Biggest Loser' about a couple of hours ago..

I'm telling you that that show is very inspiring!!

The trainers (Bob, Kim and Jillian) are so dedicated to their teams.

They push them so hard that the contestants not only lose weight but they also learn how to appreciate themselves for who they are.

The contestants turn their negative thoughts about their weight into positive ones!

They learnt how to be strong, both physically and mentally.

One thing I found extremely attractive was the GOAL shirts that they were given.

On each and every shirt, there will be a goal imprinted on them.

That is a good way of motivating people!

I really like this saying on a guy's shirt..

"to become half the man and twice the man"

or this on a woman's shirt...

"to finish what you've started, for once"

These simple sayings will drive anyone to strive for the best!...

And I've definitely seen them work out!

They need a LOT of preserverance... and I take my hat off to them for that!

Well, my life is pretty enjoyable now..

the hard part isn't here yet... may i repeat.. YET..

so, I'll be enjoying it for the moment..

I've been watching a lot of movies these days...

1. Race to Witch Mountain

2. Shinjuku Incident

3. Knowing

4. He's just not that into you

5. Marley and Me (twice...)

6. 12 Rounds

7. Confessions of a Shopaholic

8. Coming Soon

9. Paul Blart: Mall Cop

!!! I can't recall all the movies that I've watched .. but this is MOST of it..

signing out.

Yours truly,

*Me*

Updates

2009-03-06T16:24:00.000-08:00

well, i haven't been updating my blog for a while now..

there is so much to say but i can't seem to "wordify" my thoughts..

Is that even a word? ... never mind..

anyway, SPM RESULTS are COMING OUT SOON!!! March 12, to be exact..

Oh my goodness.. the anxiety, the nervousness, the horror!!!!! *gasp*

okay.. lets not think about the results for now... i repeat.. for now... or the next few days..

oh yeah... Jia Pey.. if you're reading this, i want to play badminton!!!! For some reason, i am like addicted to badminton... maybe after badminton we can go play ping pong.. or swim? haha! don't worry... i won't take you to the deep end! i won't go there myself.. coz there is no lifeguard... i think.. if got then i don't mind going!

Badminton! Badminton! Badminton!

oh oh oh... i am dying to watch so many movies... here is the list:

Movie List for March 2009
1. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
2. Slumdog Millionaire
3. Marley and Me
4. Seven Pounds
5. The Reader
6. Valkyrie
7. Love Matters

the definition of love - Andrew Marvell (1621-1678)

2009-02-07T16:18:00.000-08:00

My Love is of a birth as rare,
As 'tis for object strange and high:
It was begotten by despair
Upon Impossibility.

Magnanimous Despair alone
Could show me so divine a thing,
Where feeble Hope could ne'r have flown
But vainly flapt its Tinsel Wing.

And yet I quickly might arrive
Where my extended Soul is fixt,
But Fate does Iron wedges drive,
And alwaies crouds it self betwixt.

For Fate with jealous Eye does see
Two perfect Loves; nor lets them close:
Their union would her ruine be,
And her Tyrannick pow'r depose.

And therefore her Decrees of Steel
Us as the distant Poles have plac'd,
(Though Loves whole World on us doth wheel)
Not by themselves to be embrac'd.

Unless the giddy Heaven fall,
And Earth some new Convulsion tear;
And, us to joyn, the World should all
Be cramp'd into a Planisphere.

As Lines so Loves oblique may well
Themselves in every Angle greet:
But ours so truly Paralel,
Though infinite can never meet.

Therefore the Love which us doth bind,
But Fate so envious debarrs,
Is the conjunction of the Mind,
And Opposition of the Stars.

shadows of the past

2009-01-30T16:48:00.000-08:00

i always thought that not talking to you will make everything alright.. apparently i was wrong.. dead wrong... there is nothing i can do anymore... it haunts me.. when i get up in the middle of the night, i think of all those times.. don't ask me why. because that is the question that has no answer. i know you moved on. and everything seems right but on my side it is not. i have nothing else to say. i tried convincing myself that there is no point but it is not enough. can't you see? it is not so easy to forget someone who changed your life. you taught me how to be more rational. i know that there is no point now... but i can't help it.. i put on a poker face everytime people talk about it... saying that 'we don't like each other anymore'... i never wanted anything from you .. not even a relationship. i'm writing this because i cannot take it anymore. i am just going to let it be..time will decide.hopefully after a while everything will be alright.. "love is not a victory march.. it is a cold and broken hallelujah- hallelujah by rufus wainwright"

oh god...

2009-01-30T16:41:00.000-08:00

you used to call me your angel,
said I was sent straight down from heaven
you'd hold me close in your arms
I love the way you felt so strong
I never wanted you to leave
I wanted you to stay here holding me
I miss you,
I miss your smile and I still shed a tear
every once in a while
and even though it's different now
you're still here somehow
my heart won't let you go
and I need you to know
i miss you
I miss you
you used to call me your dreamer
and now I'm living out my dream
oh, how I wish you could see
everything that's happening for me
I'm thinking back on the past
it's true that time is flying by too fast
I miss you,
I miss your smile and I still shed a tear every once in a while
and even though it's different now
you're still here somehow my heart won't let you go
and I need you to knowI miss you
I miss you
I know your in a better place,
yeahbut I wish that I could see your face,
ohI know that your'e where you need to be
even though it's not here with me
I miss you
I miss your smile
and I still shed a tear
every once in a while
and even though it's different now
you're still here somehow my heart won't let you go
and I need you to know
I miss you
I miss you
I miss your smile and I still shed a tear
every once in a while
and even though it's different now
you're still here somehow my heart won't let you go
and I need you to know
I miss you
I miss you

2008-12-27T19:25:00.000-08:00

the time has come. it is too late to turn back now. far far too late.

feelings.

2008-12-27T18:39:00.000-08:00

this is not i planned,
confusion consumed me,
blurred my vision so that i couldn't see,
that sooner or later, i'm damned.

it is unfair,
but that is life,
with happiness or despair,
we part without even saying proper goodbyes.

soon, we'll be meeting different people,
but will i forget you? will it happen?
i tried but last night it failed terribly,
i have no choice but to run away.

people say that running away is not a solution,
but it helps me forget the one who hurt me so deeply,
the scar that is imprinted on my heart like a tatoo,
forever and ever.

each day, it cuts me deep inside,
the wound gets bigger and bigger,
soon enough, the soul dissipates bit by bit,
until the empty body is left to wilt like a rose by the window,
waiting, waiting, waiting...
for who it does not know..

the heart wilts along with the rose,
as the days go by,
it sheds petals by petals,
until none is left,
you know that revival is futile,
whatever it is,
it is dead.

My immortal -Evanescence

2008-12-20T19:44:00.000-08:00

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

[CHORUS:]
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase-

[Chorus]
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

[Chorus]
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me....

What hurts the most-Rascal Flatts

2008-12-20T17:14:00.000-08:00

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do
It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart That I left unspoken
What hurts the most Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
What hurts the most Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do

it's time!

2008-12-17T06:07:00.000-08:00

the FUTURE...

the two words that sound so freakingly scary to everyone.. well... to me at least.

it's like there is a forked road in front of me and i don't know which one to take.

it is the decision that will change my life.

the start of something new.

is it the safe path or the one less travelled?

i wouldn't know unless i have the courage to choose..

i know that "easy won't be part of the equation".. and it will be a bumpy road ahead of me...

obstacles are a definite..

usually...there is no turning back.... the point of no return

my dad said that is entirely up to me...

but what if i screw it up? what if i can't make it? what if i waste money?

all my life i have been waiting for the moment where i can make my own decisions... but now my parents are actually allowing me to make them... i don't know what to do...

now...i rather them make the decision for me..

but i know that eventually i have to make my own decisions... i have to learn..

Dad: you will learn through your mistakes.. you have to.... but to do that.. you have to make your own mistakes. then only you can learn from them.. don't let us make those mistakes for you ..

and we can't protect you forever...

what would my decision be?

the million dollar question...

well... i'll have to make it no matter what...

"if you risk nothing, you risk everything" -Geena Davis

-emo day-

2008-12-15T05:49:00.000-08:00

Problems! Problems and Problems!

1. choices

2. broken dreams

3. unhappiness

4. unemployment

5. backstabbing

6. gossips

7. losses.. (people or even belongings)

8. unrequited love

9. broken hearts

10. i can't think of anymore right now but there are more that you can think of

"once a failure.. always a failure"

" if you ain't first.. you're last" - talladega nights: the ballad of ricky bobby

you told me otherwise. you told me to believe in myself. that i must have faith in myself. you were the one who said have confidence. and it is not about winning or losing. it is about giving my best. you were the one who took the trouble to calm me down everytime i'm nervous. you were there when i needed you. it is because of you i became more confident.( or at least more confident than before). it is because of you, i learnt to think of the future and the consequences that it has upon us. you made me a more rational person. you showed me good examples by being a perfect role model. it is because of people like you i have discovered that happiness does not rest in one thing... instead it must be sought. you showed me how important focus is on whatever i'm doing. you somehow made me feel alive. and the most important thing of all... you showed me that all problems have their own particular solution. you are a good buddy. buddy, i wanna thank you just for being there and you will always be my buddy.

"some friends cannot be replaced..."-eragon

"buddy, you are absolutely irreplacable"- vanessa

thanks for everything.

if i were a boy

2008-12-14T02:24:00.000-08:00

If I were a boy, even just for a day
I'd roll out of bed in the morning and throw on what I wanted and go
Drink beer with the guys, and chase after girls
I'd kick it with who I wanted and I'd never get confronted for it
Cause they stick up for me
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man
I'd listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he's taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
If I were a boy, I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it's broken so they think that I was sleeping alone
I'd put myself first and make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she'd be faithful, waiting for me to come home
To come home
If I were a boy
I think I could understand,
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man
I'd listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he's taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
It's a little too late for you to come back
Say it's just a mistake, think I'd forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You got it wrong
But you're just a boy
And you don't understand (yea, you don't understand, oh!)
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Because you've taken her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy

if and only if..

vents.

2008-09-08T07:32:00.000-07:00

i can't believe this. no focus. no attention paid. nothing. i mean why me? why now? at this crucial moment? the last lap is definitely the most important thing ever, for now. yeah, you guessed it. SPM. no, i am not writing today to vent my stress that i am experiencing because of SPM. it is not that i never tried to study but everytime i try, i think of you. yeah. i admit it. i am still not over it yet. you think its that easy? well, maybe for you but for me it is like ripping my heart out of my chest. until today, i am still wondering why you did that. i just want to know. few months have passed. everytime i see you, i still have butterflies in my stomach. everytime you talk to me i feel my heart in my mouth. now i am lost. i seriously don't know what to do anymore. ANYMORE! i cannot help it. i am sorry. maybe my own hallucinations got me here to this point of confusion. i just want to know the truth. well, maybe this is the truth. i dunno. this is really starting to get to me. i can't deal with this now. i have trials in another two weeks. i'll be damned if i don't do well. you're not affected i see. well, it is good for you. all i need now is someone who can tell me what to do. is this as crazy as it think it is? when other people mention your name, i feel sad. i don't know why. i mean we were not together but.... it is not other people who made me happy.. it was you. and i am glad that you still do. your jokes and your laugh. they make me feel warm on the inside. so, here i am venting out my feelings. not because of spm. lol. i feel that maybe i should just be invisible and maybe it won't hurt so much anymore. yeah. maybe. just maybe. god please help me! i really need this. please. at least let me study or concentrate.

0-damages-0

work work and more work

2008-08-24T02:50:00.000-07:00

i love leona lewis's songs....

one of them is better in time!!!

man it rocks! it is meaningful.... haha

so many things to do so little time...

i think i am going to do it one at a time...

DUH!!!! you're not superwoman!!!

task 1) add math project

task 2) homework

task 3) more work

i better go already!!! chao

.......

2008-08-17T04:41:00.000-07:00

actually... being EMO is not fun..

come on... i have to cheer up....

*yeah come on*

i just have to accept the fact..

right... from now on... a new me...

a new style... a new way of living

no more crappy messed up me!

*yeah right. that is going to take forever*

"hey at least i am trying. give me credit for trying"

a good friend told me to try living differently

and that it is worth it...

i am up to it...

bring it on!!!!

come on... i'll make sure i won't fail...

nike: JUST DO IT!

emo-ing

2008-08-16T05:29:00.000-07:00

i dunno what came over me... haha..

i dunno... i wanna jump and fly.... feel free...

*guess that is not going to happen. jumping maybe but not flying*

i dunno whether to be emo or to be......

i got nothing.. haha...

watched romeo and juliet the other day....

so nice... and touching

*EMO*...

"well, hey, i can't help it*

*EMO*

"what??!!?!? is there a problem being EMO?"

*yes*

"well, i don't really think so... "

*haha...EMO....*

"whatever"

ok that is just weird... anyway it is a nice show....

William Shakespeare is a genius....

*girl, he is dead*

"i said that he was a GENIUS. did i say anything else?"

*throws rotten eggs*

"Hah! you missed. bad throw."

ok back to the topic on romeo and juliet...

i love the quotes......

*yea yea... *

"SHUT UP!"

..........

*i am having fun*

"shut up!"

*fine*

.........(silence)........

thank you ... now, here are some of the quotes from the movie

"Is love a tender thing? It is too rough,Too rude, too boist'rous; and it pricks like thorn."

"Good night, good night! parting is such sweet sorrow,That I shall say good night till it be morrow."

"Give me my Romeo; and, when he shall die,Take him and cut him out in little stars,And he will make the face of heaven so fineThat all the world will be in love with nightAnd pay no worship to the garish sun."

"Virtue itself turns vice, being misapplied,And vice sometime's by action dignified."

"Adversity's sweet milk, philosophy . . . "

"For never was a story of more woeThan this of Juliet and her Romeo."

sweet ain't it...

i love them.......

*EMO*

"i remember asking you to shut up"

*did you honestly think that i would?*

" ARGH!!!!!"

BREAKING DAWN!!!!!!!

2008-08-06T07:38:00.000-07:00

guess what??? i finished BREAKING DAWN!!!! haha... actually finished it yesterday

the book is so amazing.... EDWARD!!!! oh.. renesmee...

ahhhh.....

haha... when my teacher said that got 2 extra copies of the book

i went cuckoo.. ahha... coz i didn't being money...

so, i lent RM15 from kimmie... haha... i paid the rest myself...

(the money was for something else actually)

i couldn't help it!!! it's so precious..!!!!

it is like my baby ... haha.. like how renesmee is to bella... haih!!!!

the craze is back!

anyway, i did both the pancakes and the macaroni...

well... i added my very own touch to the macaroni...

haha..... you wouldn't guess what i did...

a little bizarre but it worked... it wasn't that bad....

it was actually ok..

(slaps self for bragging)

haha... the pancakes were not bad.. just that without the syrup ... it didn't feel right!

haha!

2008-08-03T06:01:00.000-07:00

i just got the new timetable for school...

wow...

i am speechless....

there is only one word that can explain my feelings now..

SPM! haha...

anyway, mi mancherai is soothing my nerves now..

my freaking shoulder hurts...

i experienced something so heartbreaking yesterday...

i was in borders walking over to the information counter and said..

"excuse me, can i still order breaking dawn?"

"is it by stephenie meyer?" she asked..

(fingers typing the author's name and the title furiously on the keyboard)

she hmmm-ed... and looked up

with high hopes and on the verge of biting my fingernails...

my eyes gleaming with hope and faith....

it all crashed down when she muttered those words...

"i am sorry. we're out of stock. there are more on the way but not this round. sorry"

it was like the world behind me cracked into a million pieces...

i don't want it the next round... i wanna read it on monday...

i was like going crazy but i kept calm and smiled at the lady...

"how can i know when the new stock is arriving?"

(takes a card from the side and giving it to me)

"you can always call up"

i walked out with crushed dreams .. but with hopes that the book will arrive within this month

sorry for being so dramatic ... but it is a very NICE saga...

the juciest i have read so far...

loved twilight, new moon and eclipse...

i am sure i will love breaking dawn...

i love it.

shall i say it again ?

i love it..

actually i like edward cullen!!!!

he is so romantic... edward...

(slaps myself and say "he is a fictional character. Get a grip")

EDWARD CULLEN!!!

anyway, i have decided to make mac and cheese...

so guys get ready... if it is sucky... i apologise first...

haha! no promises but i will try my utter best...

(now playing broken vow-josh groban)

nice song... might wanna try listening to it if you haven't... haha

Food Food and more FOod

2008-08-01T19:44:00.000-07:00

just watched dracula dead and loving it

so funny

before that watched the wade robson project..

man his body is.....wow!!

anyway, 2nd test is finally over...

three days of pure suffering and agony

and it is just three days..

trials is just a month away...

great...

jia pey made mango ice cream and brought it to school...

damn, it is GOOOOOODDDD!!!!

so creamy, so milky so mangooo-ey

yum yum

thank you jia pey..

now i guess it is my turn to make something and bring.

haha...

later cannot eat one

muahhaa...

lets see...what is there...? mac and cheese?

pancakes? haha

guess i have to go look for more recipes..

leaving the past behind

2008-07-18T23:22:00.001-07:00

take a bow

Oh
How 'bout a round of applause?
Yeah
Standin ovation
Ohwoah Yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
You look so dumb right now
Standin' outside my house
Tryin' to apologize
You're so ugly when you cry
Please
Just cut it out
Don't tell me you're sorry,
Cause you're not,
And baby when I know,
You're only sorry you got caught
But you put on quite a show.
Really had me goin'
But now it's time to go,
Curtain's finally closin'.
That was quite a show.
Very entertainin'.
But it's over now.
Go on and take a bow.
Grab your clothes and get gone.
You better hurry up,
Before the sprinklers come on.
Talkin 'bout,
'Girl I love you, you're the one.'
This just looks like a rerun.
Please.
What else is on?
And don't tell me you're sorry,
Cause you're not.
Baby when I know,
You're only sorry you got caught.
But you put on quite a show.
Really had me goin'
But now it's time to go,
Curtain's finally closin'.
That was quite a show.
Very entertainin'.
But it's over now.
Go on and take a bow.
And the award for the best lie goes to you!
For makin' me believe
That you could be faithful to me.
Let's hear your speech.
How 'bout a round of applause?
Standin' ovation
But you put on quite a show.
Really had me goin'
But now it's time to go,
Curtain's finally closin'.
That was quite a show.
Very entertainin'.
But it's over now.
Go on and take a bow.

leaving the past behind

2008-07-18T23:22:00.000-07:00

the wrongs of life

2008-07-13T07:38:00.000-07:00

with me there is always something wrong:-

1) messaging the wrong person

2) taking the wrong books to school

3) bringing wrong tuition file to tuition

4) taking the wrong medicine

5) doing the wrong things at the wrong time

6) eating the wrong things

you know...i never was like that... i wonder why i am .... this sucks... i mean i am in a mess.... what the hell!

and now....this is wrong too!!!!!

is it me or is it me???

irritations

2008-07-12T19:36:00.000-07:00

some days are perfect, calm, relaxed while others are tensed, agitated and packed. some days are just boring.

when i woke up this morning i thought to myself,

ok, this is it, time to rock,

but when the time came,

i couldn't... had to wash car

damn!

ended up not doing anything,

it irritates me,

what does?

how in the world would i know...

lets see...

i was walking on the streets and *Bam* i stepped on something...

praying it is not shit...

i looked at my toes,

it is shit!

darn that dog,

ok fine

when i was playing badminton,

i hit the racquet on my knee...

it throbed for a while..

went away,

then my sister hit the shuttle a little too hard,

hit me on my stomach.

i tried to get her back

but i ended up getting tired

some days are bad but some are good.

i should just appreciate the good days!

actually there are many good days in a year!!!!

it depends on us to set the mood of the day...

if we smile when we wake up,

and tell ourselves that it will be a good day

then a good day it will be

but if we wake up on the wrong side of bed,

don't worry,

there is always the next day to make it right!

Twilight

2008-07-04T08:51:00.000-07:00

this picture is so nice... don't you think that they have chemistry together ... i can't wait for the moviee!!!!

Omg!!! Twilight!!! man, the book is a BOMB!! so i guess the movie will be a bomb too... haha

that picture is edward cullen- robert pattinson...

Ranting !!!

2008-06-29T03:16:00.000-07:00

the road to your heart closed,
the sun which once shone on that path went into hiding,
the face which once made my heart beat,
gone with the wind.
so now i sit here,
pondering on the reason why,
solemn, stern,
the expressions the feelings,
my mind saundering into oblivion,
little did i realise,
my heart gave a sigh,
pain blossomed with me,
excruciating,
like a stake driving itself through me,
perhaps worse,
when you call my name,
i drift off into the pale blue sky,
to me,
sad or happy
it is all the same...

the gift

2008-06-22T05:19:00.000-07:00

messed up. CRUSHED. torn into a MILLION pieces. not to mention the fact that i feel like CRAP all the time. i have been going insane, having mood swings and loads of things were rushing through my mind. mostly, i was thinking about this. how stupid was i to let this happen...? apparently i have lost my ability to reason when i lost this precious gift of mine. when i looked at the gift my mind becomes serene no matter how angry am i. when i am sad or down, all i have to do is talk to the gift and miraculously it gives me the answer. i haven't been thinking straight... the pain and agony beneath me is too hard and too painful to mention. nights have been hard for me. the day isn't any less painful. i just need an answer. i want to escape from the agony that i am in. to elude all pain and heartache that i am enduring. to get out of the mess that i put myself in. to reason with logic and to give all i can in what i do. for an angel to care for me the exact way that edward cared for bella in twilight. i need that angel now. the craziness in my mind is rejecting all sanity. i have never felt this way before. never indeed. everytime i lay my eyes on you, they never want to look at anything else. now it feels like i am a magic spell gone awry. my mind wants to shut you out forever but..there are reasons why my heart does not want to do so and that is why i am stuck in between. i try to forget.... but i guess.... i can't. let time be the judge of everything.

p/s:

bear in mind that i did not use any names!

David archuleta

2008-05-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

see how he connects with the song when he sings.

david!!! omg i was so freaking sad that he didn't win.. but he is good. A very good ballad singer !!

just PLAIN stuff

2008-05-25T06:01:00.000-07:00

i haven't been updating my blog for ages!!! i certainly can say since the 1900. haha! exaggerating much! well, life goes on no matter what. this year has been a tough year for me, at least. spm and stuff like that. just had teacher's day on friday. there is nothing much that i can say for now. can't think of anything to say! ooh! had choir exam today.. this afternoon and i was so nervous. afraid that i make mistakes and go off pitch. well, it is over now. then i have choral fest this weekend. busy for holiday! but it is fun being busy. at least i can refrain from being a couch potato. haha. so i'll leave it hanging here. will be back to update soon... i hope!

p/s: here are pictures that we took in school ages ago but i am updating it now

after canteen day!!! man we had fun! sorry i stole it from you , jiap

friends. they stick by your side through thick or thin and through your ups and downs.

2007-12-20T16:28:00.000-08:00

all i need is time. to do what i have to do. i can't stand it anymore.

2007-05-18T04:09:00.000-07:00

i haven't been updating my blog ever since ...i dunno. anyway, today is the second day of exam. sobs.sobs. still a long way to go. let's see what have i done today. nothing. nada. elek. i suddenly felt very stressed out when i came back and decided to take the day off. well, i released my stress through talking on the phone(my friend called me,of course), drawing and singing. i started doodling and found out the i could 'draw' my feelings out, so i did. somehow i did a black unicorn. funny huh? it looked distorted. blame my drawing skills of mine. haha. after drawing some hearts i decided to do something else. i updated some new pictures on my friendster profile and changed my shoutout.

2007-04-23T02:37:00.000-07:00

i left something somewhere a few nights ago. i forgot where i put it. i drew a picture of it yesterday but i gave it away. it doesn't mean anything to me but why am i feeling guilty of giving it away? i drew that picture so hard. today, had aerobics. sang along with chihuahua. what a boring life. then when we went back to class, i had to do some homework. that's all for school life. after school i rushed like a mad girl to the library. i was just told that got library duty. i am not myself these few days. i dunno why. my mind is going haywire. stress? maybe. i have no idea. i have no idea what have i been doing the past few days either. haha. when i go to school i feel happy because i have my friends to laugh with me. this morning, before aerobics, we talked about last night's pck. so funny. vj utt is cute. i dunno why i am saying this. ahaha. i sound crazy don't i. this is getting scary. no it isn't. anyway. gtg. got homework. bye.

2007-04-19T02:38:00.000-07:00

sad* you can take it just don't break it. waiting for the sky to drop.

2007-04-11T01:35:00.000-07:00

y am i not feeling better? you know, because of recent events i have been feeling worse. i read something the other day and actually felt intimidated. to day is the third day of me being at home, sleeping. i can't get up neither can i study. geee.... i wonder if i still have a little of my brain cells left with me. life is so miserable being sick. ok. tomorrow i must get up, get out of bed and go to school. no matter how dizzy i am. i am not going to sleep at home for the whole day anymore... i have missed a lot and i wouldn't wanna miss some more. wish there is a way that can cheer me up.

i think that...

2007-04-10T03:06:00.000-07:00

so what's up? i haven't been posting for a while now because i am busy doing homework and mostly cheerleading...hahah...sports day is over though... haih... got third for cheerleading... not bad...well, now i am sick. i had fever for four days and i have cough. sad huh? well, the only time when i laughed was when i called my friend and talked to her on the phone. we laughed about everything. but after that it was back to being miserable for me. sunday afternoon, i felt dizzy and had the urge to throw up. it was dead uncomfortable.... am still having it now.... everytime i wanted to throw up... nothing comes out... gee.. i never ever wanna get sick ever again.

2007-03-28T00:27:00.000-07:00

haih..... life.... my posts are getting shorter and shorter ...what to do....

2007-03-09T04:20:00.000-08:00

haih.....today 10km hike tomorrow..... cycling expedition.... tired .... haih..i hope i come back safe and sound.... and i hope i come back in one piece

2007-03-05T01:29:00.000-08:00

help...! help!!! haih .... what is the point...hahaha i am failing anyway.... nvm i will be back!!!

2007-03-02T02:03:00.000-08:00

what hurts the most.... by rascal flatts...(nice song)

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do
It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do

stupid posting by mua.

2007-02-24T17:15:00.000-08:00

iaatlafom. ihmambm. itfpishthtilh. lsttm. mptssfaibom. hscib. ydwif. nittwahbl. iydlmystm. dbahmf. iaahbtw. irnttsn. ymmthgoneayammtspoe. ft. lttshimh. hcibss. how dumb! haahhaha
only jia pey can understand.

love you i do. again another song from dreamgirls

2007-02-23T19:26:00.000-08:00

never met a man quite like you
doing all you can
making my dreams come true
you strong and your smart
you've taken my heart
and ill give you the rest of me too
your the perfect man for me
i love you i do
mmmmm i love ya
never i have felt quite like this
good about myself
from our very first kiss
im here when you call
you've got it all
and confidence like i never knew
your the perfect man for me
i love you i do
youve got the charm
you simply dissolve me everytime
as long as you drive
im along for the ride your way
ive said it before
there wont be a door thats closed to us
im puttin all my trust in you
cuz you you'll always be true
i never couldve known this would be
aaah you and you alone yeahhh
all for me
i know your the best you passed every test
its almost too good to be true
your the perfect man for me
i love you i do
your the perfect man for me
i love you i do doooooooooooooooooo

listen. this song is nice

2007-02-23T19:21:00.000-08:00

Listen, to the song here in my heart
A melody I start but cant complete
Listen, to the sound from deep within
It's only beginning to find release
Oh the time has come for my dreams to be heard
They will not be pushed aside and turned
Into your own all 'cause you wont listen
Listen, I am alone at a crossroad
I'm not at home in my own home
And I've tried and tried to say whats on my mind
You should have known
Now I'm done believing you
You dont know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you gave to me
But now I've gotta find my own
You should have listened
There is someone here inside
Someone I thought had died so long ago
Oh Im screaming out and my dream to be heard
They will not be pushed aside or burned
Into your own all 'cause you won't listen
Listen, I am alone at a crossroad
I'm not at home in my own home
And I've tried and tried to say whats on my mind
You should have know
Oh now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you gave to me
But now i've gotta find my own
(bridge)
I don't know where I belong
But I'll be moving on
If you don't, If you won't
Listen, to the song here in my heart
A melody I started
But I will complete
Now i'm done believing you
You dont know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you think you gave to me
But bow I gotta find my own
My ooown

when times are hard

2007-02-15T01:10:00.000-08:00

when times are hard i usually say "don't give up", hang on and you will do it. but when i am talking about this i can't really say that.....in my mind i already gave up from the moment it happened...... so i rather it not....yesterday was a sad day for me as m grandaunt passed away. she was the one who critisises me and push me to the limit. well..... haih....i guess its all for now lar....not really in the mood to post because of recent events......