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Sunday, June 29, 2008

the road to your heart closed,
the sun which once shone on that path went into hiding,
the face which once made my heart beat,
gone with the wind.
so now i sit here,
pondering on the reason why,
solemn, stern,
the expressions the feelings,
my mind saundering into oblivion,
little did i realise,
my heart gave a sigh,
pain blossomed with me,
like a stake driving itself through me,
perhaps worse,
when you call my name,
i drift off into the pale blue sky,
to me,
sad or happy
it is all the same...

Because you love me for who I am. 3:16 AM.
Sunday, June 22, 2008

messed up. CRUSHED. torn into a MILLION pieces. not to mention the fact that i feel like CRAP all the time. i have been going insane, having mood swings and loads of things were rushing through my mind. mostly, i was thinking about this. how stupid was i to let this happen...? apparently i have lost my ability to reason when i lost this precious gift of mine. when i looked at the gift my mind becomes serene no matter how angry am i. when i am sad or down, all i have to do is talk to the gift and miraculously it gives me the answer. i haven't been thinking straight... the pain and agony beneath me is too hard and too painful to mention. nights have been hard for me. the day isn't any less painful. i just need an answer. i want to escape from the agony that i am in. to elude all pain and heartache that i am enduring. to get out of the mess that i put myself in. to reason with logic and to give all i can in what i do. for an angel to care for me the exact way that edward cared for bella in twilight. i need that angel now. the craziness in my mind is rejecting all sanity. i have never felt this way before. never indeed. everytime i lay my eyes on you, they never want to look at anything else. now it feels like i am a magic spell gone awry. my mind wants to shut you out forever but..there are reasons why my heart does not want to do so and that is why i am stuck in between. i try to forget.... but i guess.... i can't. let time be the judge of everything.
bear in mind that i did not use any names!

Because you love me for who I am. 5:19 AM.


javascript:void(0) About: Vanessa =) -the rants and ramblings of a young adult at the beginning of a journey of a lifetime. nineteen this year. Loves: God. shopping.dancing. chocolate.muffins.cookies. sushi.bags.shoes. ice cream.storybooks.

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Thoughts to live by
▪ Because God created us to live and live we shall. ▪ Because God loves us for who we are. ▪ No one loves us the way God does. ▪ And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might-Deuteronomy 6:5 ▪ A loving heart is the truest wisdom -Charles Dickens
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